April 04, 2007


1. T.I.: You are the Art Blakey of this game. (Metaphor shift alert.) Keep dancing across the barline like a marine running tires.

2. Akon: Please continue to appear on all records released in North America.

3. Rick Ross: What exactly the fuck are you doing? The only good thing about you, and it isn't much, is that "I am never going to entirely wake up" voice. You're getting aggro, Rick? You are having ideas, Rick? No, Rick, you're not. You need to repeat the same words over and over so you don't get confused. Being the Jim Jones of Miami is not the worst fate.

4. Fat Joe: Man, you are so psyched you had a bigger hit than Pun. You'll never say it, but you think it after every half-assed verse like this.

5. Baby: You don't look like a Baby. Think of name change: Big Baby, like a reverse Bow Wow.

5. Lil Wayne: It's startling when you're just good. Why did Swizz get the better verse? The bigger label? The better beat? Good choice. You're better than everyone here except for T.I. You can argue all you want with Jay-Z, but don't get too stroppy with Tip. He is not going anywhere.

6. Nate Hills: You're going to have some really tense conversations with Tim if you stay this hot.

7: DJ Khaled: Good looking on the phone calls.

(Please cc Papoose.)

Posted by Sasha at April 4, 2007 10:26 AM | TrackBack