August 26, 2008

CONFUSION

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Katy Perry and her minders are vexing. There are so many things wrong with "I Kissed A Girl" and "Ur So Gay" that I hardly know where to start. If you are reading this, you likely don't need me to start; you can perceive these things by yourself. But here is where the paid assassins vex us!

"Hot N Cold" is as casually misogynist as any of her other joints, but it has Max Martin in it, and when Max is on the chorus, I fear I could be led to participate in all kinds of horrible activities, simply by the indomitable nature of his sugar. Or, since I hate candy, Martin is conquering me with be a big fucking potato chip covered with Marmite and chicken salad ZOMG fuck this I am about to kill a LUNCH PRODUCT. (Max is on "Girl," but I don't think he could sell me on that crap unless he broke out something as rugged as "Since U Been Gone." And I know Dr. Luke is involved, but I have reason to believe the most killerest hook is Max.)

NEW, USER-GENERATED CONTENT: Keehnan Konyha writes: "The only thing that is easing the blow of Katy Perry's weirdo demographic grip and obvious, laser-sighted plan to ruin my life is Gangsta Boo's auto-tuned "remix" of "I Kissed A Girl." (She takes her sweet time showing upólike, two minutes.)"

Posted by Sasha at August 26, 2008 12:08 PM | TrackBack