September 02, 2008

HEY, YOU LYING LIARS

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“You guys said if we went to Shoney’s and I took off my shoes and scarf and ate three ketchups you would give me an Internet. Bullcrap. THIS is just a phone hooked up to a lightbox. It is NOT a MAGIC phone. It’s not even a television. I just called my mom and what did I see? The same goddamn slide of you corncobs staring at me. So I pushed the button on the side and got a picture of the Grand Canyon. THE GRAND CANYON, which is not where we live. This is NOT an Internet, it is a goddamn VIEW-MASTER. I am going to tell everyone that Main Ingredient are phoney baloneys and I'm giving this jimjam to my nephew. Tomorrow, I am stepping out with New Birth AND The Nite-Liters. They may even be the same band, but what do I know? I CAN’T CHECK ON THE INTERNET NOW, CAN I?”

Posted by Sasha at September 2, 2008 02:06 AM | TrackBack